Rex Huppke
Rex Huppke
Rex Huppke writes a humor(ish) column. He is considered (by himself) to be America’s most-beloved columnist, though there is no empirical evidence of that. Before becoming a columnist he spent a decade reporting on social justice issues, from poverty and gang violence to the gay civil rights movement. He previously worked for The Associated Press.Source
Chicago, Illinois
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Column: NASA’s Perseverance lands on Mars while Tucker Carlson goes space cadet over Texas windmills

Column: NASA’s Perseverance lands on Mars while Tucker Carlson goes space cadet over Texas windmills

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneFeb 19, 2021 at 3:12 pmAs a group of brilliant scientists and engineers landed a research rover on the surface of Mars, ending an exquisitely complicated 300-million-mile journey, an interstellar tribute to the power of science, something very stupid was happening in Texas.A state reeling from a deadly winter storm and a catastrophic loss of power was getting swept into a perversely anti-science, right-wing narrative parroted by Fox News’ nonsense-itarians like Tucker Carlson and Republican politicians like Texas Gov. Greg Abbott.AdvertisementJust days before...

February 19, 2021
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Column: In defense of Marjorie Taylor Greene: Think of all the times she HASN’T wanted to execute Democrats

Column: In defense of Marjorie Taylor Greene: Think of all the times she HASN’T wanted to execute Democrats

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneJan 29, 2021 at 5:00 amHello, I am a congressman in the U.S. House of Representatives, and it has come to my attention that some want to see newly elected Republican Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene expelled from Congress.While I may not agree with everything the Georgia lawmaker says, I think expulsion is wholly unwarranted. After all, who among us hasn’t, from time to time, openly supported the execution of some of our colleagues?AdvertisementHas Rep. Greene embraced the QAnon conspiracy theory about a global cabal of liberal child abusers, claimed that school...

January 29, 2021
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Column: Crybaby Trump has gone ‘coup-coup’ and GOP nods along. Call it what it is: Crazy, stupid and dangerous.

Column: Crybaby Trump has gone ‘coup-coup’ and GOP nods along. Call it what it is: Crazy, stupid and dangerous.

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneDec 09, 2020 at 2:01 pmI realize I’m just a simple newspaper columnist, but it seems having a lame-duck U.S. president openly advocating a coup is a really bad and insane thing, yet the people who most loudly call themselves patriots don’t appear to give a whit.Maybe I’m on an island here, but the conclusion that can be drawn from the following string of facts concerns me:Advertisement1) Joe Biden clearly and unequivocally won the 2020 presidential election.________AdvertisementThe Chicago Tribune publishes a variety of columnists. Columns are opinion content...

December 9, 2020
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Column: Trump and his ‘rigged election’ liars are going to get someone killed

Column: Trump and his ‘rigged election’ liars are going to get someone killed

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneDec 02, 2020 at 5:00 amPresident Donald Trump and his bad-at-everything, bewilderingly bonkers bandwagon of “rigged election!” liars are going to get somebody killed, quite possibly a Republican.Don’t take my word for it. Listen to Gabriel Sterling, a respected Georgia election official who also happens to be a lifelong Republican.AdvertisementAt a Tuesday news conference, Sterling directly and angrily addressed Trump and his baseless claims of election fraud and said: “Mr. President, it looks like you likely lost the state of Georgia. ... Stop inspiring...

December 2, 2020
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Column: A Trump concession speech: ‘I hereby concede that I beat Sleepy Joe Biden’

Column: A Trump concession speech: ‘I hereby concede that I beat Sleepy Joe Biden’

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneNov 07, 2020 at 12:17 pmAs a devoted supporter of President (for life) Donald Trump, I refuse to even begin to acknowledge he may have lost the presidential election to Sleepy Joe Biden.Did every major news organization, including Fox News, call the election for Biden on Saturday? Yes. But moments before they did that, President Trump tweeted: “I WON THIS ELECTION, BY A LOT!” So clearly the outcome is up in the air. A president doesn’t just send an all-caps tweet willy nilly.AdvertisementBecause I love our president so much, and because I have spent so much...

November 6, 2020
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Column: Trump and Biden town halls showed us two worlds, and only one of them is terrifying

Column: Trump and Biden town halls showed us two worlds, and only one of them is terrifying

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneOct 16, 2020 at 11:33 amToggling between former Vice President Joe Biden and President Donald Trump taking questions in separate televised town halls nearly killed me.I’ve been dizzy for hours and still can’t spell my name. Each time I close my eyes I see a flashing image of a calm expanse of ocean followed by a flashing image of Pennywise, the murderous clown from Stephen King’s novel “It.”AdvertisementClicking from one town hall to the other Thursday night felt like being atomized and transported to one reality only to be scrambled up and rocketed through a...

October 16, 2020
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Column: Trump puts Secret Service agents at risk with COVID Car Ride — but relax, it was medically necessary

Column: Trump puts Secret Service agents at risk with COVID Car Ride — but relax, it was medically necessary

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneOct 05, 2020 at 11:55 amAs President Donald Trump continues to battle COVID-19, a number of questions have come up about the accuracy of health updates coming from his medical team and the decision to allow him to take a Sunday SUV ride to wave at supporters outside Walter Reed Medical Center. As a self-appointed member of President Trump’s nationwide team of citizen-physicians, I want to assure Americans the president is doing unbelievably fantastic and everything you’re hearing about him is accurate.AdvertisementFirst, let me share my credentials. I am an...

October 5, 2020
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Column: Trump’s upcoming coup: A formal invitation from a cowardly president who knows he might lose

Column: Trump’s upcoming coup: A formal invitation from a cowardly president who knows he might lose

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneSep 25, 2020 at 5:00 amThis will be remembered as the week President Donald Trump formally announced his plans to stage a coup.Coups, as a general rule, don’t receive much advance publicity. But Trump needs attention the way normal humans need oxygen, so he went ahead and let the American people know what’s coming after the Nov. 3 election.AdvertisementAsked Wednesday if he would commit to a peaceful transfer of power, the leader of our soon-to-be-former democracy said: “We’re going to have to see what happens. You know that I’ve been complaining very strongly...

September 25, 2020
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Column: Always-calm Trump lied about coronavirus but patriotically made sure no Americans died of panic

Column: Always-calm Trump lied about coronavirus but patriotically made sure no Americans died of panic

I can tell you this: If there’s one thing President Donald Trump does not want to do, it’s create a panic. Tweet from Trump, Sept. 10, 2020: “If I don’t win, America’s Suburbs will be OVERRUN with Low Income Projects, Anarchists, Agitators, Looters and, of course, ‘Friendly Protesters’.” Advertisement Many Americans are outraged over revelations that Trump told journalist Bob Woodward in February that he knew the coronavirus was “more deadly than even your strenuous flus” while he was publicly saying the virus might be less deadly than the flu. Trump also acknowledged to Woodward in March,...

September 10, 2020
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Column: Biden picks Kamala Harris. Trump should dump Mike Pence and replace him with a yacht.

Column: Biden picks Kamala Harris. Trump should dump Mike Pence and replace him with a yacht.

AdvertisementBy Chicago TribuneAug 12, 2020 at 5:00 amPresumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden’s decision to choose Sen. Kamala Harris as his running mate leaves President Donald “Scared” Trump with little choice — he needs to dump Vice President Mike Pence.I know, it’s a shame for both Trump and Pence. The two seemed like a match made in a strange and wildly inaccurate version of heaven.AdvertisementBut Trump will see the fanfare the Harris pick brings — she’s an energetic and experienced lawmaker, a former prosecutor and attorney general, and the first woman of color on a major party...

August 12, 2020
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