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Trump Tells Americans Not to Worry About Coronavirus as CDC Says U.S. Outbreak a Certainty

Trump Tells Americans Not to Worry About Coronavirus as CDC Says U.S. Outbreak a Certainty

On Tuesday, one day after the Dow Jones had its , the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Americans that it is all but a certainty that the deadly virus will spread throughout the United States. “It’s not so much of a question of if this will happen in this country any more but a question of when this will happen,” said Dr. Nancy Messonnier, director of the National Center for Immunization and Respiratory Diseases. “We are asking the American public to prepare for the expectation that this might be bad,” she added ominously. One person who isn’t worried in the slightest? Noted...

February 25, 2020
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Republicans Are One Bill Away From Making It Legal to Shoot a Protester Whose Sign They Don’t Like

Republicans Are One Bill Away From Making It Legal to Shoot a Protester Whose Sign They Don’t Like

In the wake of last summer’s brutal murder of George Floyd by police officer Derek Chauvin, millions of people around the country started to take part in racial-justice protests that have necessarily continued to this day—thanks to, most recently, the killing of a 20-year-old Black man pulled over for allegedly blocking his rearview mirror and the of a 16-year-old Black girl shortly before the jury reached a verdict in the Chauvin case.Republicans obviously do not like these protests for a variety of reasons, chief among them being their insistence that racism does not exist. (As you might...

April 21, 2021
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Cartoon Villains Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene Vote Against Cancer Patients

Cartoon Villains Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene Vote Against Cancer Patients

There are a lot of horrible people in the Republican Party, but on Thursday, freshman representatives Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene made the case that they are the absolute worst. But wait, you say, how could these two possibly top what we already know about them, which is that Boebert is a – who, hours after the Colorado supermarket shooting, sent a fundraising email warning that Joe Biden is going to take away people’s guns, and, in the case of Greene, that she’s a who has , , trans people are pedophiles, and suggested that Muslims shouldn’t be allowed to ? And the answer is...

April 16, 2021
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Florida’s Trump-Loving Governor Just Made It OK to Hit Protesters With Your Car

Florida’s Trump-Loving Governor Just Made It OK to Hit Protesters With Your Car

As racial-justice protests swelled around the country during his last year in office, Donald Trump made it abundantly clear that he had little regard for the constitutionally enshrined right to assemble. Regularly conflating peaceful protesters with violent ones, he frequently threatened to unleash “law and order” (read: police brutality) on people for having the audacity to attempt to have their voices heard. “Any protesters, anarchists, agitators, looters or lowlifes who are going to Oklahoma please understand, you will not be treated like you have been in New York, Seattle, or...

April 19, 2021
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Report: Good News for Donald Trump’s Waistline Is Bad News for America

Report: Good News for Donald Trump’s Waistline Is Bad News for America

Is Donald Trump going to run again in 2024? It’s a question that the United States—nay, the world—will likely be nervously asking itself for the next three and a half years, thanks to (1) his long history of teasing presidential runs until the last second and (2) the fact that Senate Republicans declined to ban him from ever holding office again when they had the chance. While Trump clearly hated the actual job of running the country, he obviously loved the power that came with it, as all despots do. Still, we probably won’t know what he’s going to do for some time, though according to a...

April 16, 2021
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Ivanka Trump’s Vaccine Selfie Didn’t Go Over as Planned

Ivanka Trump’s Vaccine Selfie Didn’t Go Over as Planned

On Wednesday, after a monthslong hiatus from social media, former first daughter Ivanka Trump tweeted that she’d received the COVID-19 vaccine and encouraged others to do so as well. “Today, I got the shot!!! I hope that you do too!” she , adding, “Thank you Nurse Torres!!!” alongside a blue heart emoji, like a real #influencer #girlboss. Undoubtedly, Trump believed she was doing a public service by urging her followers to get the lifesaving vaccine and demonstrating that she had no qualms about doing so herself. She likely figured she’d receive a deluge of praise for the tweet, with people...

April 15, 2021
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Thanks to Republican Anti-Vaxxers, the U.S. May Never Reach Herd Immunity

Thanks to Republican Anti-Vaxxers, the U.S. May Never Reach Herd Immunity

As Joe Biden prepared to take office, he announced an ambitious target to vaccinate 100 million Americans within his first 100 days. When it became clear he was going to that goal well ahead of schedule, he upped it to 200 million, a figure his administration is this week. As part of that effort, on Wednesday, the president will on businesses to give workers paid time off to get their COVID-19 shots. On Monday, everyone in the country over 16 became eligible for the vaccination, and as of Wednesday, 40% of the U.S. population had received at least one dose of a vaccine and more than 50% of...

April 21, 2021
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Republicans Are Basically Starting a White Supremacist Caucus

Republicans Are Basically Starting a White Supremacist Caucus

As the Republican Party has made abundantly clear over the last number of years, one of its main platforms is racism. Obviously, in 2021, it’s hard to just come out and say, “Whites Only, Please,” though one group of GOP lawmakers has come extremely close, and by close we mean that it presumably won’t be long before they start doing team-building exercises that involve burning crosses and sporting white hoods around the Capitol.Punchbowl News that an emerging “America First Caucus“ linked to representatives Louie Gohmert, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Paul Gosar has been circulating material...

April 16, 2021
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Jim Jordan Trips Over His Own Asshole Trying to Debate Anthony Fauci

Jim Jordan Trips Over His Own Asshole Trying to Debate Anthony Fauci

Early on in the coronavirus pandemic, Republicans decided to make Anthony Fauci their archenemy, having found in the immunologist a perfect target through which to whip up their base. Fauci, of course, is everything the GOP hates: a man of science with not one but two degrees who displayed a treasonous level of disrespect by failing to agree with every single thing Donald Trump said about the virus, and refused to tell reporters, “I actually think injecting bleach into your veins is a great idea.” Outside of hysterically whining about him on Fox News, one of the ways GOP lawmakers have...

April 15, 2021
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Brett Kavanaugh Rules Children Deserve Life in Prison With No Chance of Parole

Brett Kavanaugh Rules Children Deserve Life in Prison With No Chance of Parole

In September 2018, in between screaming about his and crying over his , the Senate Judiciary Committee: “If we want to sit here and talk about whether a Supreme Court nomination should be based on a high school yearbook page, I think that’s taken us to a new level of absurdity.” In fact, lawmakers that day weren’t deciding whether or not to confirm Kavanaugh to the highest court in the land based on “a high school yearbook page” but over , which he denied. Nevertheless, Kavanaugh’s position that day was that people shouldn’t be held accountable for things they do as minors. But what he...

April 22, 2021
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