Name: Missouri to Close State Parks Because People Are Dumbasses | News Blog
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Missouri to Close State Parks Because People Are Dumbasses | News Blog

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Switch to the of this page.Everyone . Everyone knew that one day, somehow, the morons of the world would endanger us all. And in Missouri, all of those morons decided that “social distancing” meant playing frisbee in the park and crowding nature trails. And now, Jefferson city has found a way to fix all of that.Starting this Thursday at 5 p.m., four state parks will be fully shut down to the public and one state park will be partially shut down. The issued that said overcrowding in the parks had forced this development and that the temporary closures will last at least through the entire month of April.listed these parks as the ones to be impacted by the decision:“The operation modifications, effective at 5 p.m. on Thursday, April 2, include the following:Castlewood State Park will close.Elephant Rocks State Park will close.Watkins Woolen Mill State Historic Site and Park will close.Weston Bend State Park will close.St. Joe State Park will close the off-road vehicle riding area.Gates to individual parking lots may close at all state parks when the lot reaches capacity.”But it’s possible that this won’t be the end of it. ’s statement also points out that as conditions change they will “make additional closures as needed.”They encourage potential visitors of any state park to check ahead of any parks visit to make sure that the park is still open to the public. They also encourage all visitors to carry “hand sanitizer, soap, wipes and drinking water as services may be limited.”Now, tell all of your dumbass friends that this doesn’t mean that they need to hustle to a state park before the closures on Thursday. And also do us all a favor and tell them to stay home. Please? Thanks.Email the author at jaime.lees@riverfronttimes.comTags: , , , , , , ,Riverfront Times works for you, and your support is essential.Our small but mighty local team works tirelessly to bring you high-quality, uncensored news and cultural coverage of St. Louis and beyond.Unlike many newspapers, ours is free – and we'd like to keep it that way, because we believe, now more than ever, everyone deserves access to accurate, independent coverage of their community.Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing pledge, your support helps keep St. Louis' true free press free.&nbsp;&nbsp;|&nbsp;&nbsp;Please enable JavaScript to view the|April 15-21, 2020Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.No results308 N. 21st Street, Suite 300St. Louis, MO 63103Main: (314) 754-5966Advertising: (314) 754-5914Classified: (314) 754-5925All parts of this site Copyright © 2020 Riverfront Times.© 2020Riverfront TimesWebsite powered by

Switch to the of this page.Everyone . Everyone knew that one day, somehow, the morons of the world would endanger us all. And in Missouri, all of those morons decided that “social distancing” meant playing frisbee in the park and crowding nature trails. And now, Jefferson city has found a way to fix all of that.Starting this Thursday at 5 p.m., four state parks will be fully shut down to the public and one state park will be partially shut down. The issued that said overcrowding in the parks had forced this development and that the temporary closures will last at least through the entire...

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Jaime Lees

riverfronttimes.com

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Missouri to Close State Parks Because People Are Dumbasses | News Blog

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