Name: Be THAT parent: Adolescence, a modern construct, a lie
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Be THAT parent: Adolescence, a modern construct, a lie

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Although the first use of the word adolescence appeared in the 15th century, it wasn’t until 1904 that the first president of the American Psychological Association “discovered” adolescence as a stage of development.
And thus began the decline of manhood/womanhood.&nbsp; I don’t think that is an exaggeration, either. A good definition of adolescence – a period of time where children are allowed to experience the privileges of adulthood without assuming the responsibilities of adulthood.&nbsp; This has affected males the hardest, as seen by the number of perpetually immature men in our society, a.k.a, video-game-obsessed basement dwellers or the equivalent thereof.
As some of you know, we have 4 children.&nbsp; We did not raise them with the expectation of rebellion as teenagers.&nbsp; The touches of rebellion that 2 of them experienced was DIRECTLY related to youth group at church, which is why I didn’t enroll the other 2 in it.&nbsp; It made me realize that youth groups, for the most part, are the churches equivalent of adolescence; they perpetuate immaturity, and a lot of times indirectly (and directly) encourage rebellion against parents.&nbsp; But this is not a post about why I hate youth groups.
The actual point of this post is to encourage parents to be different.&nbsp; To not expect rebellion from our kids.&nbsp; To not fall for society’s norms.&nbsp; To raise our children to be increasingly mature, starting very young.&nbsp; Make them work hard.&nbsp; &nbsp;Seldom pay them for it.&nbsp; Then, when they are making minimum wage as teenagers, they feel like they are accomplishing something, instead of complaining they are being underpaid.&nbsp; Hard work is and should be its own reward.
Don’t expect your teens to rebel.&nbsp; It’s not how God created them.&nbsp; Yes, they will be more independent and you have to adjust your household to that, but they don’t have to hate you, disobey you, or sulk in silence.&nbsp; In fact, if you have trained them all along to not do these things, it rarely happens.
A key to a lifestyle that achieves this, however, is going to look a bit different than your average suburban, busy-as-heck lifestyle.&nbsp; You have to have time at home to train them up.&nbsp; &nbsp;You have to be the person who spends the most time with them, or they WILL NOT see you as the person with the final say in things of morality.&nbsp; If you are careless or neglectful about who they spend time with, they will be corrupted.
If you have begun to fall for this lifestyle where things, sports, and/or activities are more important than raising your children and spending quality time at home, it isn’t too late to change.&nbsp; Make time at home a priority.&nbsp; If you don’t love it, learn to love it, for the sake of your children.&nbsp; We have them for such a short time, but our impact for good or not so good is profound.&nbsp; And we ARE affecting them for eternity, like it or not.&nbsp; Don’t just live, get up every day with the intention of raising your children properly, regardless of the time involved or the difficulty of circumstances.
Because even the lack of intentional parenting, even though our parenting may be loving and not neglectful, still causes lack.&nbsp; If we do not fill their moral tanks DAILY, then those around them will be filling them with trash.&nbsp; And while maybe 1% of the time this may not be true, the majority of the time it is.&nbsp; Just from listening to my grown daughter talk about the kids in our local area that she knows from working retail, and not taking into account my own 47 years of personal experience – immorality, apathy, rebellion, and despair are RAMPANT.&nbsp; RAMPANT.&nbsp; Kids buying pregnancy tests, various retail substances to inhale or ingest, condoms, abortion pills, and on and on…… this is what your child is immersed in if they are just tossed into the system with the average peer.&nbsp; That isn’t even covering the tragedy of pornography that they WILL without a doubt experience if you aren’t extraordinarily intentional.&nbsp; That alone has lifelong repercussions.&nbsp; I know, because I was first introduced to it at the age of 6 because my parents were not careful about my friends.
Be intentional about morality.&nbsp; Be the example.&nbsp; Have high expectations.&nbsp; Don’t be afraid to discipline consistently.&nbsp; Love them and prioritize them above everything but God and your spouse.&nbsp; Seriously consider homeschooling.&nbsp; Be willing to downsize so you can afford to do so.&nbsp; Our kids, our families, are worth the sacrifice.&nbsp; I can personally attest to this.&nbsp; I have a college degree, almost a second degree, had jobs, new cars, the whole works.&nbsp; But there came a day when God opened my eyes and I realized my heart was not prioritizing the proper things.&nbsp; I came home to my children, and have NEVER, EVER felt like I wasted my life by doing so.&nbsp; We have made our finances work for 21 years on one income.&nbsp; And we lack nothing that is actually important.&nbsp; Not one single thing.
So, it is possible to not have children who languish in the thing called adolescence.&nbsp; They can be mature, responsible, hard-working, and moral, from quite young ages, and become increasingly so if you are intentional about this outcome.&nbsp; And you might want to evaluate that youth group, to see if it is the source of many of your children’s behavior or morality issues……..

Although the first use of the word adolescence appeared in the 15th century, it wasn’t until 1904 that the first president of the American Psychological Association “discovered” adolescence as a stage of development.
And thus began the decline of manhood/womanhood.&nbsp; I don’t think that is an exaggeration, either. A good definition of adolescence – a period of time where children are allowed to experience the privileges of adulthood without assuming the responsibilities of adulthood.&nbsp; This has affected males the hardest, as seen by the number of perpetually immature men in our...

Be THAT parent: Adolescence, a modern construct, a lie

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